I can't believe my Isabella Grace is turning 3 on the 26th of this month! Oh how time has flown!! This little tiny pee-wee is still a tiny pee-wee but full of life, energy, smiles & giggles! I am so excited to throw her a birthday party but am sad to say that it will be mostly adults. Being a working mom outside of the home leaves very little time for social interaction of parents with kiddos around the same age. Our playdates, well, they have become null & void. Today...I find myself really weepy over this. I know Izzy knows no different but I do. She gets to play with the kids at daycare but I don't get to socialize with the Mom's...we are all coming & going at various times. She gets to play with the kids at church and we pass people with brief conversations and smiles but we never make solid plans to get together. This goes for Alison too but a it's a little different now that she is in school and we can start inviting her classmates. Also, a lot of our friends have older kids, so Ali fits in better with them but Izzy...not so much. Ok, can you hear this Mom's heart breaking a little bit. <<pause...wiping away tears>> What to do?
Hmmm...well is there really anything I can do? Not at this moment. I can only hope that those we invited come & that we all have a great time! Which I know a great time will be had...if I have a one gloating Momtastic moment it is this...my hubby, sis-in-law & I put on some really fun parties!! Do any of you struggle in this area of not having enough time for playdates, feeling like there are more adults coming to parties than kiddos and what do you do about it? Do you also have the same pet peeve I do...when you send out an invitation...you should at least RSVP within a day or two, even if it is a maybe & then change it to a Yes or No when you know for sure, hopefully a week before the party?? Oh...this is something I struggle with! I want to plan & be prepared. I need to know many goodie bags, treats, food, etc...I am going to need. I am on a budget and last minute shopping doesn't always fit in the budget criteria!
As I am sitting here typing...I am realizing that I need to put myself out there a little more. I need to ask about arranging playdates and making the time work. I need to try to fit another hour into an already busy schedule so my girls can continue to grow socially and not be just stay at home kids. Somehow I will work this in...that's a really good 2012 goal.
Well...I should go and get dinner started, switch the laundry over & empty the dishwasher. Would love to hear if you have any helpful ideas or tips! I know a Momtastic moment is in the making tonight...just not sure what it is yet! Did you have a Momtastic Day?
Putting myself out there is going to be the hardest thing ever when (if) I become a mom. It is definitely the thing I'm the worst at!
ReplyDeleteMost of the kids my kids socialized with outside of daycare were children of my parent friends. That's not an option here yet, but it is much easier with Noah now that he's in school. For the younger ones, I feel that they do get a lot of socialization in daycare/preschool/church so play dates and such aren't as essential. Of course, I'm naturally a shy person, so I could be making excuses :).
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel on several of these issues! When I went to plan David's Birthday party I only found a couple of his friends that were his age to invite, most were older kids. He just doesn't have the social network of friends that his older brother does. :-/ It was still a super fun party full of a variety of ages of kids and I can relax knowing he gets lots of playtime with other 3/4 yr olds at daycare.
ReplyDeleteOn the issue of people not responding to rsvp's (me being one of them!) I also had the same problem with David's party! No one responds to invitations anymore, and it is super frustrating. I found myself calling people or just buying extra (which was not good on the pocketbook!). Many waited until the week of. I think you just have to let it go. Sending a reminder is helpful, but at this point that's all you can do.
As for playdates, I also beat myself up because I have lost contact with so many friends and their families and feel guilty that I don't have time to meet up with people. Its super hard when your weekends get booked up with events, there's no time to get together with other families. Not to mention that I usually spend my weekend either 1)Wanting to veg out and relax and play with the kids since it was a crazy busy week with work and other night time activities OR 2)trying to catch up on housework that sat around all week because I was too busy and exhausted to get to it (ie: laundry pile sitting on my couch from Wednesday until Saturday!) Needless to say, our relationships with others suffer because we are full-time working moms and trying to do it all. Don't fret, Izzy will get her playdates in at church and occasional times. And when they do happen they will be a super fun special time that will seem even more special because they don't happen frequently :-)
Jamie, Thanks for being so real! I feel the same way. It is so hard when at the end of the day all I want to do is collapse after we do homework, deal with dinner and maybe a load of laundry. Playdates (child or mommy) on top of that? How? Billy gets play time at the gym after I pick him up from after school care and he gets to play with the kids in after school care.
ReplyDeleteI am guilty of not RSVP'ing. Sorry, yes, we will be there. I will even reply to the invite right now.
Love ya girl! You're doing a great job as a mom!
Thank you ladies for all your insight! I so appreciate you all!! It is really interesting to see a common thread in a lot of what you have written. Mom's...working outside to the home or not...we all worry about our kiddos, if we are raising them to be social enough, are they happy with what we given the in their needs/wants...and so much more!
ReplyDeleteI have to just keep chuggin' right along and throw in extras here & there when I can! As long as my girls know that they are the first thing I want to love on in the morning & the last thing I want to love on at night and do it with as many smiles, laughters, memory making moments, sometimes some tears & time-outs...than I am doing my Momtastic duties & responsibilites!! And first & foremost... making sure they know that God is at the head of all we do!
Well...I know what I am going to share tonight so I will leave this comment & come back later with my newest post. Again, thank you ladies!! =0)